Friday, November 6, 2009

Self-esteem & Identity


This week in the girls groups we discussed how we feel about ourselves and whether or not other people see us they way we do. Is the picture you have of yourself in mind the same picture being portrayed to others?

We discussed personality traits and characteristics and then worked on identity poems. Who am I? A very important question. Our self-esteem all wrapped up in our identity. Our self-esteem is our beliefs and feelings about ourselves and sometimes what other people think about us, say about us, and/or do to us can have negative or positive effects on our self-esteem.

In being on a journey to help others develop positive identity I understand the importance of having space and time to express feelings and write freely. Everyone in the sacred circles this week wrote 2 poems: one about themselves and another about why people might be talking about them. I wrote the following pieces during this session


Who Am I?


On the Native American Medicine Wheel,
As a leader
I fly like an eagle, big ideas, big picture, visionary
open minded, flying above and carefree,
soaring through life

But I am also like a deer big bright eyes open wide
loves to laugh and smile and get along
and gather together with friends and collaborate,
loves to read, learn, grow and share
good mother, friend, daughter

Smart and observant like a bear
Yet Quick to act like a buffalo
warrior, confident
fighting for daughters, sisters, mothers


Why Do People Talk About Me?

Why do they make fun of me?
Saying I'm fat, short, skinny, with bad acne and smelly
Why do they call me names?

My mom always told me "Don't Worry. It's Jealousy"
So I'd try not to let it get the best of me

And be happy to be me
Don't have time for negativity
I'm free!

I'll keep living my life like it's golden
It's the God in Me

Friday, October 23, 2009

Gossip can be healthy?


When girls and women gather in groups to talk the results are powerful. Friendships are built and bonds grow. Girl talk is not about gossip. It's about exchanging ideas, sharing, growing, supporting one another and healing. Girl Talk in a sacred sister cirlce is a safe space to express concerns, emotions, and dreams. It is a space where you process your thoughts, reflect and renew.

I am inspired by the openness and enthusiasm of the young women in the girl talk circles I am currently working with. In our first session we talked about everything from sibling rivalry to what it means to be a good friend.

It is important to have intergenerational groups where girls and women gather to together to learn from one another about sisterhood.

If you've been asking yourself, "How can I change the world?" Here's an answer . . .
gather the women and girls

Suggested Reading

1. Goddesses in Every Woman

2. The Millionth Circle: How to Change Ourselves & the World - The Essential Guide
to Women's Circles

3. Sacred Circles: A Guide To Creating Your Own Women's Spirituality Group

4. Urgent Message From Mother: Gather the Women, Save the World

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Women, United, Are Uniquely Equipped To


An adaptation of excerpts from "Gather the Women, Save the World" by Jean Shinoda Bolen

Women have qualities that men have not developed, and these talents are needed right now! The dormant power of women together is the untapped resource needed by humanity and by the planet. The distinguishing female abilities that contrast with standard behavior have to do with qualitative differences in response to stress and use of communication. These differences relate to women's ability to manage resources responsibly, to work together for the common good, and to base ethical behavior upon compassion for others. In 2000, research conducted at UCLA found that females of many species, including humans, responded to stressful conditions with a TEND & BEFRIEND response, not flight or fight like many male species.When women's lives become stressful, they talk to their friends, look after their children and animals, straighten up the house, water their plants, clean the lab, studio or desk where they work. And as they do, their stress level goes down, and the amount of the maternal bonding hormone, oxytocin, goes up. Men on the other hand, have an increase in adrenaline, when they're stressed, a reaction that prepares their bodies to run or stay and fight (flight or fight)

In the male world, which we currently live in, intellectual development (rational thinking, data-based infomration, objectivity, the realm of the mind) is fostered and rewarded while emotional development (feeling, intuition, aesthetic appreciation, subjectivity, the realm of the heart) is usually not. When both are importan, both sides of hte personality develop and both hemispheres of the brain are used. Since the women's movement, girls, especially, have has social support to develop both sides of themselves and have been freer to do so than boys. As a consequence, women as a gender are more likely to be whole people in this sense.
It is time to gather the women - for only when women are strong together can women be fiercely protective of what we love. Only then, will children be safe and peace a real possibility. Without an adult or society to protect them, children are vulnerable to whatever bad happens. Boys wait their turn to be men with the upper hand and girls become acculturated to becoming powerless women.

Until women collectively become involved in creating a culture of peace to stop violence begetting violence in the human family, women and children continue to be the primary casualties.

I believe that the socialization of very young boys, who are shamed for being soft-hearted, emotional, imaginative, or sensual, and are discouraged from interestes and inclinations that men consider unmanly, contributes to one-sided development. The other contirbution is fear and humiliation. Unprotected, neglected and abused boys and young men grow up to emulate those who has power over them. The plague of violence in the home, in street gangs, and by terrorists is a reflection of an economic and social world where Goddess and Mother as a feminine principle is absent, and no one cares about each person in the humnan family. Until women who believe the divine sacred feminine principles are able to protect both their boys and girls from abuse and bullying, boys can not grow into whole people.

The male perspective, from schoolyard experience on, is that males gang up, take advantage, and that a team player or a guy who wants to stay out of trouble keeps his mouth shut. This "go along to get along" and "look the other way" attitude is a pre-vailing one in many places. Something that men instinctively seem to know that women do not is that men in high positions either know what is going on and don't want it known or they don't know and would rather not know. In a male world, once a man knows a problem exists, he knows it can make him look bad (be "one down". Women's experience is different . In the female world, it is not only bonding and stress-reduing to discuss a problem or admit a mistake, it generates support, ideas, and possible resources. Women are more able to admit mistakes, ask for directions, work collaboratively, seek consensus, be motivated by empathy to alleviate suffering, and take care of vulnerable. Until women are equal partners in setting values, it is not safe for boys and men to be feeling and nurturing people without suffering from patriarchal judgments that they are not man enough. Patriarchy is endangering all species and the planet itself. Mother Earth and mothers need women to set the priorities, take care of resources, and stop wars and other abuses of power.

However, there is a blueprint to begin the construction of a world in which women would be safe from violence, exploitation, and discriminiation, could look after the well-being of their children, and have a voice in all areas of life including the environment. The blueprint comes from previous women's movements, but this next movement we are approaching may be a women's peace movement. The goal is to stop violence, resolution of conflicts, and restoration of peace. Domestic violence, school ground violence, street violence, terrorism, and wars have the same origins in the need to dominate and to be predator of prey.

Women who respond to this message have a sense of connection and sisterhood with other women. We are experiencing a time when the fate of the Earth and all life upon it is at risk. There is a great connection between the status of women, women health issues, and the condition of our environment.

In villages and neighborhoods, mothers gather and talk, share infomration, gossip, laugh, keep an eye on the children and do whatever else brings them together. On college campuses, women organize meetings, talk into the night, form life-long friendships. Women bond through conversations in which rappport and trust grows through what we tell each other and how we respond. We talk about ourselves and our relationships. Women learn through conversation. Women's stories can inspire "if she can do that, I can too!" They also provide warnings of what to be wary of; women listen and take heart "What happened to her could happen to me" There is an empathic support, problem solving, and stress relief in women's conversations. Women's talk leads to symmertrical connections, rather than heirarchical ones, and consensus building, both of which are needed for cooperation and collaboration. Women's talk needs to be recognized as a positive force - a means and method of bonding and understanding eac other and other people - that humanity needs to be able to take a next step toward planetary community.

What cannot be done by men or by individual women, can be done by women together. Earth is home; it is time to take loving care of the planet and all life upon it, beginning with where you are, what you love, and your vision.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Get Your Vote On! Sept. 15th Primary Elections Too Many People Running for Office! Do Your Research!



People fought for the right to vote for hundreds of years, but women were NOT the last to win this right in 1920 less than 100 years ago, Young people were!

This year marks the 37th Anniversary of the ratification of the 26th Amendment which gave 18-20 year-olds the right to vote. Before 1971 only citizens 21 years-old and older could vote.

If you're 18 and haven't registered to vote you must! Don't take your liberties for granted! We make the mistake of only paying attention to Presidential Elections but there are many local representatives running for office and Primary Election day is 14 days away!

Primaries for partisan offices are held in September, with General Elections in November. Primary Elections are held so that voters registered with a qualified political party may select their party's nominees to the general election for partisan offices. Because a primary is a party election, only voters registered with one of the parties qualified to conduct a primary in New York City may vote in their party's (Democrats, Republicans, etc.) primary. General Elections are held to elect candidates to public offices. For partisan offices, nominees from the party primary elections appear on the ballot, along with independent candidates. http://www.vote.nyc.ny.us/

Why are local elections important? Local representatives are your legislative branch, they write bills to propose to become laws and then vote on whether or not proposed bills become laws. The person representing you in your own backyard could be the difference between whether or not for example, the new health care laws get passed. Your local representatives also represent you in the electoral college, remember we don't have a complete democracy, we have a republic.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Today is Women's Equality Day



President Obama, along with many organizations and group, are celebrating Women's Equality Day! Why is this important?

At the behest of Rep. Bella Abzug (D-NY), in 1971 the U.S. Congress designated August 26 as “Women’s Equality Day.” The date was selected to commemorate the passage of the 19th Amendment to the Constitution, granting women the right to vote in 1920. This was the culmination of a massive, peaceful civil rights movement by women that had its formal beginnings in 1848 at the world’s first women’s rights convention, in Seneca Falls, New York.

The observance of Women’s Equality Day not only commemorates the passage of the 19th Amendment, but also calls attention to women’s continuing efforts toward full equality.

Discussion Questions:

1. Have you ever been treated unfairly because you're a girl/woman?

2. What do you think should be done to challenge sexism and the oppression of women?

3. What are you doing to promote sisterhood and gender equity in your daily life?

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Friends are Better Than Boyfriends/Girlfriends

Somethings to Think About:

Have you ever really examined male-female relationships? Have you ever really examined why you want a boyfriend/girlfriend in the first place?

Why bother labeling someone has your boyfriend/girlfriend when you don't even know if they can simply be your friend, and without knowing how much they really love you without labeling you as their possession?

TOP 5 REASONS NOT TO HAVE A BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND

1. Everyone I know that has a boyfriend/girlfriend says their boyfriend/girlfriend gets on their nerves lol

2. Boyfriends/girlfriends come and go, but friends are forever

3. If someone can be with you as your friend and have your back no matter what that someone is a better person than a boyfriend/girlfriend ever would be

4. Boyfriends/girlfriends seem to always want to control or manipulate you while friends accept you for who you are

5. Every guy who has been "just a friend" as done more for me than any boyfriend did

People are just more honest when they're your friend. Generally speaking people will have boyfriend/girlfriend relationships just so they can be with someone when they know that person is not even good for them.

So, girls let's not get caught up in boyfriend/girlfriend drama and instead spend our youth focused on our own personal hobbies and interests. If you live your life focused on yourself and the things you like to do, such as dancing, drawing, skating, shopping, writing poetry, singing, etc. then when you get older and look back on life, you'll have more memories of all the fun you had and less memories of boyfriend/girlfriend drama

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Join the Movement!

There are tons of websites, organizations, magazines, and media targeting young women, but none where we can turn to for down to earth unbiased advice.

None that lifts our spiritis or inspires us to open our minds, spread our wings and live our lives without borders.

None that speak to us to an open, honest, pure voice. None that speak to us in our own voice, from our own hearts.

The Earth Angel Unlimited Blog is here to change that!

What are our concerns?

Everything from "What should I wear today?" to "How do I help my friend who is too young to have a child?"

This blog will feature poetry, art/music, event announcements, videos, and information to help us discuss and deal with our day to day issues as young women.

The world isn't getting any easier and as women we are the foundation, backbone and heart of our generation. As women we are more connected to mother nature than we realize

So, let's grow together and realize the unlimited possibilities of who we are!